Today's post isn't about a CEO or Fortune 500 company. It's about an 11-year-old girl who didn't make her school softball team. Her response to the news speaks volumes about her character and provides a lesson for us great big adults about creating opportunity out of so-called failure.
Instead of walking away in defeat, our young hero very intuitively got what was important: engage, don't avoid. She understood that if she wanted to achieve her goal - playing softball - she needed to maintain relationships rather than shy away from them, and she had to get back in the game rather than accept defeat.
Here's how she did it: A natural relater, it was important to her to first congratulate the girls who did make the team. Then, she went to the coach - in uniform - to ask if she could just practice with the team. The coach agreed. Just a few weeks later, the coach has been putting her into games. The girl who didn't make the cut is playing on the team. And, she's doing it because she didn't let rejection define her or limit her options.
We adults have plenty of reasons to be avoidant these day: layoffs, demoralization at work, lack of clear direction, distracted leadership, and of course, general financial malaise. As our young friend demonstrates, it really isn't the problem that defines us, it's what we decide to do with it that matters. Avoidance isn't the answer; Leaning in and engaging is.
Tell me about a recent defeat or let-down, and how you did, or would, overcome it.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Carol Dweck divides us into those with a "fixed mindset", who believe that we either have talent and intelligence or we don't, and those with a "growth mindset", who believe that effort plays a key role, so we can learn from our mistakes and failures and grow from them.
ReplyDeleteThe girl in the story seems to have a growth mindset. Someone else, with a fixed mindset, would have "learned" that she wasn't talented enough and not to try out again.
Managers and coaches can notice whether an employee has more of a fixed mindset or growth mindset and help the employee move to more of a growth mindset, if necessary. That would seem to provide a much stronger platform for future growth and engagement.
If you want to read more, I'd suggest Dweck's "Mindset". There are chapters about business, sports, and parenting filled with many examples.